September 2010
12 posts
This is the part in the movie where the people playing my parents are holding each other by the screen door and one of them says “Honey our little girl is growing up.”
I’ve been trying to get back into the dating game since the crushing heart break* that was Matthew. Let me tell you it’s not easy. Matthew changed me in so many ways and most of them being for the good. We are still friends and sometimes that is rough but I don’t know if I could have it any other way.
But back to my point. Before I met Matthew, which was only just a little over a year ago, I guess you could say my self esteem wasn’t at it’s highest. I used to let guys talk to me in any fashion that they saw fit to get my attention. And there I would be letting them cross certain lines and boundaries I had set up in my mind. And Matthew was never like that with me. He was very respectful and always kind. And now here I am trying to get back into the dating world. And I feel so different now. I know it’s for the better. I look at myself different and I hold myself and others more accountable in how they can treat me.
It’s so unfamiliar to me though. But it feels right and it feels better. I’ve already turned two very attractive guys that I’ve had a lot in common with down because they couldn’t learn how to be appropriate with me. I don’t know, maybe I give off this vibe. A vibe that just says “HEY BEFORE YOU GET TO KNOW ME ASK ME ABOUT SEXUAL THINGS” Like really? Come on!
Don’t get me wrong. Sex is awesome. It’s fun to talk about it’s awesome to do. But can you at least know my favorite color before we get down to talking about the nasty? I’m 24 and will be 25 before I know it and it’s weird to see how different I am from one year ago. And don’t get all Feminist on me. I know these changes aren’t all because of one guy. I know they are me and I’m the one being proactive about them but I just feel that I need to give him props for showing me what I’m supposed to be treated like.
* pause for dramatic effect
Instead of doing laundry, I just bought more underwear. This is my life now.
Okay so I deleted this a few times but I guess you really want me to say something about it.
Yes I am.
I think it’s right to assume that you mean this as an insult because 1. you are anonymous and 2. you posted it several times in my message box.
But I’m not going to take it that way. Yes I am fat. And? I don’t understand what that has to do with anything. People are all different shapes and sizes and I am very happy with mine.
Oh.. Um well I don’t ever remember stating that my blog was only for stuff I’ve been making in school but I guess at times it can seem that way. Feel free to unfollow me because I can guarantee it’s not all going to be about Special Effects.